I've never been fond of the grocery store. At least not the Walmart grocery store. I mean, I can totally get into shopping at Whole Foods or The Fresh Market or Trader Joe's (but like I have that kind of money), but Walmart is just....Walmart. Anyway, today I was actually sad. It was my first trip to the market where I didn't have to buy supplies to make Bogey's food. No ground turkey, no eggs, no rice, no white bread. I nearly cried in the meat department. I imagine people often get that feeling whilst shopping at Walmart...that feeling of loss and depression, but I feel mine was totally justified. I was not merely beaten down by an evil grocery and dry goods empire. I was beaten down by my grocery list and its missing items. It will get easier. I know this, but right now easier seems improbable. Happy seems impossible.
I miss my darling Bogey. My Bogart McWestie. My Boogers McFlufferDoodle. (John's Testies McDuff...) It hurts so much. It's hard to imagine ever getting over it.
One day at a time, right? One day it will be okay. Until then, I will continue to sob over my grocery list.